Umber (19.42 — Vera’s Story)
April 23, 2012 § 2 Comments
More time passed. I was nearing the end of my senior year in high school. Alfred had started to crawl. Kate was sure I was going through an adolescent phase, and that I would soon recover from my temporary obsession with St. Agnes’. I did not recover, however. I could not stay away from the sights, sound, and smells that all reminded me of my mother’s world. So many times I resolved to find the courage to tell Papa that I had, by this time, been receiving the sacraments in a church he didn’t approve of, but for months I found excuse after excuse to put off the day of reckoning. I wanted to believe that I was brave enough to face the upheaval that would surely follow when I finally spilled the beans, but I was, in fact, spineless. I cringed at the thought of their righteous anger. I loathed my dishonesty and cowardice almost as much as I loved my new identity as a Catholic.